Paradox of Motherhood: Exploring the Maternal Experiences
in Flora Nwapa’s Efuru
Shefali,
PhD Research Scholar,
Department of English,
Central University of Himachal Pradesh,
Dharamshala, Himachal Pradesh, India.
&
Dr. Hem Raj Bansal
Associate Professor,
Department of English,
Central University of Himachal Pradesh,
Dharamshala, Himachal Pradesh, India.
Abstract: Motherhood is closely related to the
idealized figure of biological mother, the one who is viewed as a nurturer,
caretaker and as someone who does not only protect but also sacrifices
everything for her children. This paper examines the paradox that lies between
societal expectations and individual desires. Set in colonial Nigeria, the
novel challenges gender roles through its protagonist, Efuru. This study
critically examines how Nwapa presents motherhood not just as a biological
construct but as a complex, and often conflicting set of experiences shaped by
culture, region, society and personal agency. Moreover, this paper interrogates
the ways in which Efuru problematizes the idealization of motherhood and
attempts to redefine it. Through the character of Efuru, the novel reveals the
immense pressure on women to procreate, often linking their worth to their
ability to bear children, preferably a male child. By breaking the archetype of
a “Good Mother”, the eponymous character shows how she is different from the
universal figure of a mother presented in many literary works. By tracing the
representation of motherhood across literature, feminist thought and
psychological discourse, the paper highlights how the maternal figure is
revered and restricted, celebrated and silenced simultaneously.
Keywords: Barrenness, Bride Price, Good Mother, Motherhood,
Patriarchy, Polygamy
Motherhood is the state of being a mother; it is both a
biological and social construct. It is a journey that is transformative and
dynamic in nature, encapsulating both challenges and joys, impacting women in
varied ways. It acts as a major life transitioning force, influencing how
individuals perceive themselves and society perceives them in accordance with
the prevalent cultural norms. It is considered as a challenging (unpaid) labour
due to its complexities. It is not just about giving birth but is an inherent
instinct to love unconditionally, to care for, to protect at any cost, and to
nurture.
Mothers are often depicted as figures who are sacrificing
in nature, prioritizing their children’s needs over their own. This includes giving
up sleep, personal desires, and personal ambitions. This selfless love and
affection that they display and endorse are deeply engrained in their nature
leading them to think of their existence in relation to either her husband or
children. It is expected from a mother to stick to the attribute of sacrificing
her individuality. Anita Desai (1937- ) in her work Fasting, Feasting (1999)
says, “Mother had no desire left, no dreams. Her life was entirely given up to
others” (4). Even the emotional and inner struggle that she goes through in her
life is also suppressed in this whole process as Marmee in Little Women
by Louisa May Alcott quotes, “I am angry nearly every day of my life, but I
have learned not to show it” (342). This emotional repression experienced by
mothers-- who are expected to stay calm, regardless of their own struggles
--turns motherhood as a role that demands complete erasure of self, expressing
the mental toll it can take and the identity crisis it can cause. This idea of
self-sacrifice is seen as both an honor and as a limiting trait that reduces
them just to the four walls of their house and degrades them professionally and
personally.
Motherhood is not just about transition of body but is
also a symbol of the creation of a new life. It symbolizes fertility, nurturing
and unconditional love. Traditionally, mothers are viewed as the first
caregivers who do not only provide physical support to their children but also
emotional and moral guidance. The joy of being a mother is subject to
individual experiences. While for some it brings a sense of fulfillment, for
others it may bring burden, especially when societal expectations start
clashing with personal endeavors. Women often experience multiple changes and
shifts in their experiences, roles, priorities and even how they perceive
themselves.
Motherhood both culturally and socially symbolizes
unwavering support, love, life and fulfillment. From ancient mythology to
contemporary religious practices, the mother figure represents the essence of
compassion, sacrifice and guidance. Goddesses such as Isis in Egyptian
mythology and Parvati and Durga in Hinduism represent nurturing, fertility and
life-giving energy. According to Simone de Beauvoir, the development of women’s
personality is often hindered by motherhood. In order to be a good mother, she
is expected to leave her job, sacrifice her dreams, aspirations and freedom.
Adrienne Rich (1929-2012 in her work Of
Woman Born: Motherhood as Experience and Institution (1976) argues that motherhood is both
a personal experience and a political institution often controlled by
patriarchy. Society considers motherhood as the destiny of women and for this
reason, women’s other potential contributions are often overlooked.
Depiction of motherhood in literature has been a crucial
and evolving field. Writers from diverse fields have explored the complexities
of motherhood through their writings. Representation of women in literature is
concerned with women shifting their roles in society wherein motherhood remains
a key tenet as a woman often lives in a state of constant struggle to be a
“good mother.” Literature plays a vital role in understanding how the concept
of ‘good mother’ is thoroughly portrayed and developed. “Motherhood Mystique” a
term coined by Susan J. Douglas and Meredith W. Michaels in their book The Motherhood Mystique is relevant from
the point of view of the present study. Traditional representations of mother
have mostly been single dimensional where they play minor roles in the plot.
For example Sita in the Ramayana is portrayed as a devoted mother and a
symbol of suffering and endurance. In Homer’s Iliad and Odyssey,
mothers like Hecubba and Penelope are remembered for their devotion towards
their sons and household and not as individual entities who behold personal
agency too. Motherhood is not just a biological process; it has social and
psychological impacts too. Women are expected to become symbols of sacrifice by
compromising with their dreams, aspirations and desires as individuals. They
are forced to give up their health, career and goals because society expects a
mother to be ideal in all forms and to focus on her family post-marriage.
Adrienne Rich writes: “Institutionalized motherhood demands of women maternal
“instinct” rather than intelligence, selflessness rather than self-realization,
relation to others rather than creation of self” (42). Institutionalizing
motherhood dictates that mothers should always view themselves in relation to
their children.
In literature, the figure of mother is predominantly
portrayed as a self-sacrificing, passive and morally idealized and symbolic
character, representing core values of selfless service. Classical texts,
scriptures and early novels have depicted motherhood as a form of duty; a duty
before self and this portrayal reflects the patriarchal, religious and cultural
dogmas of the time. In Biblical texts, the mother is a sacred figure. The
Virgin Mary for instance is a symbol of divine grace and purity but passive,
rarely expressing individual desires. In Shakespeare’s plays, role of women is
limited to socially defined norms. In Hamlet
Gertrude is criticized for remarrying, her agency to choose as an
individual is more often denied and questioned. In Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen portrays Mrs. Bennet as a mother
primarily concerned with the marriages of her daughters. Austen writes, “The
business of her life was to get her daughters married; its solace was visiting
and news”(5). Nathaniel Hawthorne’s
protagonist Hester Prynne in The Scarlet
Letter presents a single mother in Puritan society who is publically
ashamed and ostracized, yet she remains strong and dignified for the sake of
her daughter Pearl. Hawthrone writes, “She named the infant Pearl, as being of
great price, purchased with all she had, her mother’s only treasure” (91). The
mother characters in all these writing were shaped by moral struggle and a duty
towards their children.
However, by the late twentieth century, feminist writers
challenged and redefined motherhood as more personal than only social and
biological. Defining institutionalized motherhood as a source of patriarchy
that is designed to serve the patriarchy only, they also suggested the ways as
to how women can reclaim motherhood as a source of power and resistance.
Pioneers like Virginia Woolf and later Adrienne Rich exposed the emotional
complexity and oppression embedded with traditional roles of motherhood. The
latter writes about her maternal experiences, “My children cause me the most
exquisite suffering of which I have any experience. It is the suffering of
ambivalence: the murderous alteration between bitter resentment and raw-edged nerves,
and blissful gratification and tenderness” (21). This confessional tone
captures the emotional turmoil that earlier literature largely ignored.
Similarly, in Toni Morrison’s Beloved (1987),
Sethe’s haunting act of infanticide is rooted not in monstrosity but in
maternal desperation, “I did it because I loved my children, I did not want my
baby to die as a slave” (193). Sethe’s obsessive fear for her children being
enslaved and her traumatic act of infanticide can be interpreted as symptoms of
Postpartum Obsessive- Compulsive Disorder (POCD); her mind was continually
consumed by intrusive fear, guilt-driven hallucinations and emotional
withdrawal. Similarly, Sylvia Plath’s poetry “Morning Song” voices the
alienation and emotional distance, a new mother feels. She writes, “I’m no more
of your mother/ than the cloud that distills a mirror” (1). This work of Plath
can also be read as expressing postpartum alienation -- a complex emotional
state in which new mothers may feel alienated, disconnected from their baby,
and uncertain about their maternal identity. These post-nineteenth century
depictions refuse to glorify motherhood and its previously accepted traits;
instead, they define it as a space of conflict, survival and complexity.
This literary transition does not only reflect changing
social and feminist discourses but also reveals the deep paradox of motherhood:
a state of love and creation that can coexist with detachment, resentment, and
psychological fragmentation. This shift sets the stage for contemporary
feminist writers to explore motherhood not as a fixed ideal but as a lived,
complex and often contradictory set of experiences.
Paradox of
Motherhood
Paradox of Motherhood is defined as contradictory,
emotional, social and personal experiences that mothers often face. The paradox
suggests that fulfilling one role often comes at the expense of the other. For
example, excelling in career may lead to giving less time to family and home,
while prioritizing family life can limit professional advancements. It is “the
conflicting societal expectations placed on mothers, particularly working
mothers. It suggests they should excel at their careers as if they don’t have
children, while simultaneously dedicating themselves to parenting as if they
don’t work” (“Paradox”). Emily Edlynn in her article “The Motherhood Paradox:
Idealized and Invisible” says: “Today’s mother is expected to be all things:
fully devoted to her children, highly productive at work, and fulfilled as a
woman, an impossible trifecta”; highlights the societal pressure to be both
successful professionally and personally. For example, a mother prioritizing
her career is judged as neglecting her children or being selfish and
money-minded. This paradox encapsulates the complex and conflicting expectation
imposed on women, wherein they are expected to achieve excellence in both
domestic and professional spheres. Adrienne Rich distinguishes between
experience of mothering which can be creative and empowering and the
institution of motherhood that is patriarchal in nature and is designed to
limit women. The Yellow Wallpaper by
Charlotte Perkins Gilman reflects the psychological trauma that a mother goes
through. It shows a constant feeling of guilt, emotional detachment both from
her child and from reality she experienced as soon as she gave birth. This
mental, emotional and psychological turmoil that the narrator experiences can
be linked to present day postpartum depression or postpartum psychosis.
But here’s the thing that works against me: being a woman
and mother in our society. We are expected at every level to sublimate our
needs. Every level. From getting out of the way of a man striding down the
centre of the sidewalk to the deeply entrenched message that smaller bodies are
better (for women). From every direction we are told to not take up too much
space, to shrink, to stay quiet, to smile with sad eyes. (Edlynn)
The paradox lies in the very reality of being a woman and
mother simultaneously. From childhood only, society starts conditioning little
girls for behaving in a certain way. As she grows she is taught that marriage
and motherhood is the ultimate fulfillment. Women rather than feeling complete
and a sense of fulfillment with the childbirth, often find themselves in a
state of dilemma and disillusionment. Buchi Emecheta’s novel The Joys of Motherhood vividly portrays
this paradox, showcasing how societal reverence for motherhood can become a
source of oppression and suffering. Nnu Ego, the protagonist is celebrated and
valued only when she delivers a baby boy. Yet when tragedy strikes her family
and her son dies, she is blamed for failing to uphold her role as a good
mother. She says, “They make it look as if we must aspire for children or die .
. . I failed to live up to the standards expected of me by the males in my
life” (186). She realizes the misled idealism of motherhood. For her,
motherhood was her greatest joy and the greatest defeat. This contradiction
that was initially honored (with the birth of her son) is instantly devalued (with
the death of her son) is the paradox that lies at the core of the plot.
Published in 1966, Flora Nwapa’s Efuru is a pioneering novel in African literature and the first
novel by an African woman. It is set in the Igbo village of Oguta, almost
midway between the Igbo Women War of 1929 during which thousands of Igbo women
agitated against the tax on married women. As Ifi Amadiume notes, “In 1929,
thousands of Igbo women rose in revolt against colonial taxation policies that
threatened their economic and social independence” (Amadiume 45). This protest
in West Africa, led entirely by women challenged both colonial authority and
women’s traditional roles. Efuru as a character can be seen as inheriting this
legacy of resistance.
The
novel tells the story of this eponymous character Efuru in Nigerian Igbo
community. As an intelligent, independent and strong-willed woman, she decides
to elope with her lover Adizua -- a poor farmer without status or wealth and
doesn’t have money to offer the bride price. This daring move of Efuru is
viewed as a “shame on us” (9) by her community. This decision of eloping with a
man of different class is highly unconventional in Igbo society, where
marriages are usually arranged by families by paying the bride price. Efuru’s
encouragement of Adizua “Don’t worry about the bride price” (4) shows how Nwapa
establishes her protagonist as a bold and powerful character by giving her
voice and agency to choose. After a year of marriage, Adizua gives up farming
and joins Efuru in yam trading, later shifting to fish and crab to boost
profits. Their business grows swiftly, so now they decide to pay off the bride
price. Efuru remains committed and works hard to support the household,
highlighting her resilience and determination. But as soon as time passes, the
pain of being barren begins to weigh down heavily on her. People begin to
gossip and “to them Efuru was a man since she could not produce” (24). Efuru is
particularly tagged to be beautiful, but the village women hold her beauty
against her only when she fails to produce any child. She is not only denied personhood but also womanhood as she is
termed a man as she could not conceive. Adizua’s mother suggests him to marry
another woman “with the consent of Efuru” (26) and Efuru herself asks him “to
look around for a young girl for a wife” (84). Eventually, the birth of a baby
girl fills her with both delight and surprise, “Is it really true that I have
had a baby, then I am a woman after all”(31).
The novelist shows how Adizua eventually begins to show
his dominance and shirks from his familial duty. He fails in business and wants
his wife to take it just after a year of delivering the baby to which she
agrees. Adizua’s mother confesses that Nawashike Ogene’s daughter Efuru has
brought luck to their family, for whichever business she puts her hands in, is
profitable. Adizua starts acting queer by coming home late. Efurul earns from
her mother-in-law that Adizua’s father began the same kind of waywardness.
Efuru realizes that “waywardness is in their blood; it is hereditary” (58).
Adizua eventually abandons Efuru and their daughter Ogonium. Efuru goes to
Agnoa, Ndoni, Akiri and Ogwu to find Adizua but fails in her efforts. She
refuses to stay and wait for Adizua anymore. Ogonium dies by convulsions and is
buried but Adizua neither comes home nor shows any concern. Thinking about her
mother-in-law, Efurure solves not to follow the path that the former followed.
She registers her protest: “Perhaps self-imposed suffering appeals to her it
doesn’t appeal to me. I am capable of suffering for greatest things. But to
suffer for a truant and irresponsible husband like Adizua is to debase
suffering. My own suffering will be noble” (62). Adizua’s mother suffered at
the hands of her husband just as Efuru is suffering. However, Efuru returns to
her father and decides to rebuild her life independently, “I cannot wait
indefinitely for Adizua . . . I am still young and would wish to marry again”
(88).
Efuru later marries Gilbert, a trader who appreciates her
intelligence and industrious nature. However, village women themselves begin to
gossip about Efuru’s inability to conceive. One such woman Omirima
sarcastically tells Gilbert’s mother Amede, “It has been a year since your son
married. One year is enough for any woman who would have a baby to begin making
one”, to this Amede responds “we are productive in our family” (139).Four years
and still childless, Amede suggests that Gilbert should remarry. The women around begin to yarn the tales
about Efuru and Gilbert’s being together, swimming together and not having a
child. “We are not going to eat happy marriage. Marriage must be fruitful”
(137). Gilbert starts coming home late;
he would come late and leave in the morning. Efuru suggests him to marry a girl
as she has not been able to give him a child even after four years of marriage.
In the series of events, Gilbert accuses Efuru of adultery. It is an attempt to
shame her publically and justify his betrayal. Efuru divorces Gilbert and
devotes herself in the service of goddess Uhamiri. Efuru is finding peace not in
marriage or motherhood but in her ultimate connection with the goddess.
Paradox and
Complexity:
Efuru is an ideal woman in every way, she is intelligent,
beautiful, generous and spiritually chosen yet she is not valued because she
cannot bear children. Adizua her first husband proves to be an utter failure in
business and marriage. It is Efuru only who makes all the profit with her
skills. Her efficiency and trading skills overshadow her first husband. In Igbo
society, a woman’s primary duty is to marry and bear children, especially sons.
Without children, especially biological ones, a woman is viewed as worthless
and cursed. Efuru loses her only daughter Ogonium and fails to conceive again.
Gilbert, her second husband, distances himself from her after four years of
marriage and accuses her of adultery. Nwapa uses Gilbert’s accusations of
adultery against Efuru as a satirical commentary on how patriarchal societies
punish women who deviate from traditional roles -- particularly those who are
childless. The burden placed on women is multifaceted, encompassing societal
expectations, emotional labor, and the pressure to conform to ideals of
motherhood and virtue. The character portrayal of Efuru shows how the identity
of women is intricately linked to motherhood and how this synonymously asserts
their position in society. Nwapa introduces herself as a female archetype.
“Efuru was her name. She was remarkable woman. It was not only that she came
from a distinguished family. She was distinguished herself” (1). “Efuru
endeavours to correct the ill-gotten notion that seems to protect men even when
it is evident that they have erred. This direct confrontation is meant to
indict patriarchy which seems to thrive by using females as scapegoats”
(Sibanda 128). This reveals how Efuru is crafted not just as a passive
character but as a challenge to patriarchal norms. She gradually becomes a
symbolic voice of feminist resistance.
In African society, a prosperous woman is defined not by
how successful she is in her professional life but how effective she is in
giving sons to her family. Strong emphasis is laid on how fertile she is. On
the contrary, the men have been guaranteed the ownership of women by birth till
death. Before marriage a woman belongs to her father and after to her husband.
The role of a woman and mother is paramount as they both define the identity of
women and their status in the society.
Efuru’s identity, her worth and her purpose is defined in terms of her
marriage, fertility and motherhood. Motherhood is often seen as an important
part of a woman’s life that might decide her place in society. “Feminine
Mystique”, a term coined by Betty Friedan in her book of the same title, shows
how a woman is defined exclusively on the basis of her role as a wife and mother.
This finds resonance with the character of Efuru who is a successful trader but
not a successful wife and mother. Nwapa’s portrayal of Efuru expresses the need
to undermine such evil practices in society that construct such ideas of
motherhood. Efuru is an accomplished but barren woman who is denied not only
personhood but womanhood too. Nwapa through the character of Efuru shows how
obligatory motherhood works, when the women of the same village starts equating
her with the man because she is barren and cannot produce, “to them Efuru was a
man she could not reproduce” (23). Equating her with a man means she is failing
in womanhood by not fulfilling her reproductive duties. Fertility for Africans
is not just biological but spiritual, economic and social. Women are valued
only for procreation, continuing the family lineage and strengthening kinship
alliances, her failure in any of these results in social stigma, marital
instability or abandonment (as Efuru is also abandoned by Adizua) public
shaming, and being metaphorically or literally called as “a man.” According to
World Health Organization, infertility affects one in four couples in
developing countries, yet women disproportionately bear the blame, even when
the medical cause is male infertility.
Nwapa deliberately denies Efuru the joys of motherhood so
as to define her as an individual, self-reliant character whose identity is not
dependent on her children and husband. Rather than succumbing to the construct
that society has created for women, she finds solace in worshipping Uhamiri,
the goddess of lake. Reference to Uhamiri carries a deep symbolic, cultural and
feminist meaning. This figure of Uhamiri as used by Nwapa is not just
mythological but central to Nawpa’s critique of gender roles and her redefining
of womanhood. In traditional belief, Uhamiri often calls certain women to serve
her, and in return these women may gain beauty, prosperity, and status but
often at the cost of child bearing and marital stability. This traditional
representation of Uhamiri is a departure from the version presented by Nwapa
who offers a new interpretation in the novel. She is spiritually chosen by the
goddess after failed marriages due to infertility, “Your dream is good. The
woman of the lake, our Uhamiri, has chosen you to be one of her worshippers”
(147). This calling imparts Efuru peace, wealth and fulfillment. Efuru’s dreams
and eventual acceptance of Uhamiri’s calling symbolizes a journey towards
self-discovery and acceptance. Efuru finds success and wealth even though she
is sans child, sans husband. Efuru’s ability to be economically independent
ensures her growth and emancipation, thereby empowering hers. She was meant to
generate profit, “her hands make money” (156). Through Efuru’s character, Nawpa
explores the possibility for all black women to dream and take the control of
their lives. Nawapa through this path-breaking novel paves way for all Black
African women to redefine their identity, free themselves from the age old
bondages of husband worshipping and feel liberated. The need for a man to
strongly validate a woman’s life and her choices is prevalent in Nigerian
society. In an interview with Maria Umeh, Nwapa says: “There is this stigma on
women who elect to be single. Mothers bring up their daughters telling that
they have to be married. In my own language we say, ‘No matter how beautiful
one is, if she doesn’t get married, she’s nothing’” (160). With the character
of Efuru, Nwapa brings to fore the concept of the New Woman-- a woman who is
independent and courageous. It is worth considering that Efuru never condemns
the Igbo culture and traditions. She always compiles with the dictates of the
Igbo culture. This suggests that Efuru’s maternal desire has embraced aspects
of her cultural heritage. She does not rebel against polygamy, bride price,
motherhood, and religious practices but finds a way of empowerment and survival
within them. “Nawapa fights for the Igbo woman to be allowed to have a say in
matters concerning woman. She should be allowed the right and freedom to choose
her path without the social inhibitions that are found in the Igbo culture”
(Ogbodo et al. 150).
It can be substantially argued that Flora Nwapa’s
exploration of the intricate relationship between womanhood and motherhood
raises several critical questions: Is motherhood essential for a woman’s
happiness? Is it the sole purpose of a woman’s life? Is it the only
socially-accepted identity available to women? Through the character of Efuru,
Nwapa tries answering the dilemma that a woman hasto go through all her life.
At the same time, she challenges her readers to reflect on these societal
expectations. It is worth noting that Nwapa redefines motherhood in a radical
way --presenting it not merely as a biological reproduction, but as an emotional
and social role that a woman can fulfill even without bearing children. In
doing so, she affirms that women without children are still whole, valid and
complete, not valueless in any way. Ultimately Efuru offers a powerful image of
the “New Woman”-- one who reclaims her agency and emerges as a symbol of modern
African female identity. Though Nwapa does not offer simplistic resolutions,
she presents womanhood as a dynamic and evolving experience, full of
contradictions and strength.
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